Traditions 

Comforting or Calamitous?

New Year and Chinese New Year are all behind us. We witnessed many traditions being followed. We joined in those celebrations, like tossing ‘loh hei‘ and shouting out, “Nian nian you yu!” (May you always have more than enough), “Huang jin man de!” (May wealth and prosperity be everywhere), “Tian, tian mi mi!” (May your life be sweet like honey)”. We loved it all.

Traditions like these give us a sense of belonging. They help us create memories and take a walk down memory lane. Traditions help maintain a connectedness between generations. Most importantly, traditions are a lot of fun!

We enjoy experiencing traditions and culture during our travels. They make our travels unique. Our traditions create a beautiful quilt woven with love and care.

While a lot of traditions are simple light-hearted fun, and most of us revel in those traditional interactions and celebrations, some traditions are not so. There are many harmful practices and traditions, and they seem so ingrained in people, we give them scant thought.

A few traditions that come to mind are the centuries old tradition in Denmark that leads to the slaughter of hundreds of whales, or ‘Bride Kidnapping’ in Central Asia.

Most of us want acceptance from family, friends, and community. Hence, even when we do not approve of certain traditions, we join in or quietly put up with them just so that we don’t feel ostracised by society or family.

I wish we would all have courage like this brother and sister in the story below.

Dragons that Dared.

Once upon a time, a very long time ago, dragons lived in a land called Dragon Valley.

There were green dragons, blue dragons, red dragons, golden dragons, multi-coloured dragons, black dragons, white dragons, dragons of every hue one could imagine.

This community of dragons had a tradition whereby when a dragon boy or girl turned 10, they had to go to a town on the other side of the valley and burn a few houses. 

Many dragons did not like it. Some questioned their parents, and the only answer they got was, “It is tradition! We did it! Our parents did it! Our grandparents did it! Our great-grandparents too!” 

Their protests went unheard. “You have to do it” thundered the parents. When they did not obey orders and follow tradition, they were banished from the colony. 

Once there were dragon twins named Dilip and Deshna. It was their 10^th birthday and their parents said to them, “You are 10 today. It is your lucky day. You get to go by yourselves to the village and burn down a few structures.” 

Dilip and Deshna stood transfixed. They did not want to burn down anything, let alone houses or schools. 

But, it was tradition after all. Dilip and Deshna wanted to be liked. They wanted acceptance. With a heavy heart they set out to the village. 

They searched the entire village and finally, at the edge of a forest they found a tiny, dilapidated hut made of twigs and branches. They were sure no one must be living there and decided to burn that hut down. It was Deshna’s turn, so she took a deep breath and was about to breathe fire, when Dilip saw a little dog appear through the front door and behind the dog, a little girl. “Woof!” went the dog. “Whoa! A dragon!” cried the little girl. 

She did not seem afraid of dragons, and besides, she was happy to know dragons really existed. They played and soon became friends.

As the evening came on, Dilip and Deshna suddenly remembered the reason for their visit; they had to burn a house down! The little girl said she could help them follow tradition so that their parents and the entire dragon community wouldn’t ostracise them. 

“I have an idea,” said the little girl, “you can breathe a gigantic blaze befitting fine dragons such as yourselves!” She then led them to a tall building and said, “Breathe fire on this building.” “What building is this?” asked Dilip and Deshna in unison. 

With tears in her eyes the little girl said, “My parents were taken into this building as they were unwell, they never returned and hence this building is evil. I think it is called an hospital. Burn those walls down.” cried the little girl. 

Dilip and Deshna were puzzled but they did not wish to disappoint their new friend. Besides, they had to follow tradition. It was now Dilip’s turn. He took a very deep breath, smoke was billowing from his nostrils, but just then a little boy walked up with his grandfather. He looked very happy! The grandfather said, “Stop, little dragon! You cannot do that! It is a hospital. We get treated here. We are going to visit my daughter; she just had a baby.”

Dilip and Deshna had never heard of a hospital before and were now confused. 

They turned to their friend, but the little girl was not giving up and still wished to help her friends. She took them to a big circular building and said, “Breathe your majestic fire, Dilip and Deshna!”

Dilip and Deshna decided they would breathe fire together, so both took three deep breaths and just when they were about to open their mouths, a lady appeared on the front steps. “Wait, beautiful dragons! Pause before acting!” 

“You cannot burn the building down! This is a museum.” 

“A museum! What is a museum?” they asked.

“People visit museums and learn about the legends of the world. Do come in and I will show you around. There are paintings and sculptures of your great ancestors.” The lady handed Dilip a beautiful sculpture of a dragon.

“Thank you very much!” they said, “But we are on a mission. We must burn down a village and if not a village at least a few houses.”

“Wait, wait” she called. “We can use fire to cook, we can do with some help. We are celebrating Pongal, the harvest festival tomorrow. Today is Bhogi, where all the broken, unwanted wooden things from homes such as cow dung cakes, dried twigs and tree branches are stacked up and burnt.  We had a huge downpour today and the dried twigs and branches are all damp. It is very difficult to get the fire going. Please come with me and breathe fire onto the twigs and help get the bonfire going.” 

Dilip and Deshna happily set out to the village square where a huge pile of damp twigs, branches, leaves and old wooden things were set up. The entire village had gathered around the square. Dilip and Deshna inhaled deeply and then, to the sound of cheers from the crowd, they breathed the biggest fire they could. Embers from that bonfire rose high into the sky. The dragons in Dragon Valley could see it clearly. Dilip and Deshna’s parents felt very proud for they were sure the smoke and embers came from the houses burnt down by their precious pearls. 

Meanwhile, in the village, Dilip and Deshna enjoyed a delicious meal of roasted peanuts, sweet potatoes and sesame brittles. They sang and danced with the villagers. The little ones hopped on to the backs of Dilip and Deshna and went around the village as if riding on a train. They heard many stories of valiant dragons! 

Late that evening when Dilip and Deshna bade the villagers goodbye and flew home, their parents and all the dragons, young and old alike were waiting impatiently for them.

All of them spoke at once, “Tell us everything! We saw the bright sky and were certain you burnt down not just a few houses, but the whole village!”

Dilip and Deshna said, “We did not burn down a single house. We helped them with a bonfire. We sang and danced around the bonfire. We ate delicious food. We learnt about their culture. They are celebrating Pongal, the harvest festival. They were so kind to us!”

The entire village exploded with anger! “Making friends with humans! Dragons do not befriend humans.”

Dilip and Deshna pulled out the sesame brittles, and a dragon sculpture that was gifted them. Their parents took a long, hard look at it. Why, it looked just like their ancestors! 

“They do like dragons. We heard so many stories about dragons.”, said Dilip and Deshna.

Their parents placed the sculpture on the mantel in their home, looked at it proudly. They thought to themselves, “It is indeed better to be admired than feared!”

 Since that day, the dragons of Dragon Valley decided not to follow tradition blindly and use their discretion.

Inspired by the story, Dragons, father and son.

“Sometimes tradition and habit are just that, comfortable excuses to leave things be, even when they are unjust and unworthy. Sometimes, not often, but sometimes, the cranks and radicals turn out to be right. Sometimes, everyone is wrong.” Matthew Scully